Because Valentine’s Day was this month (I know. I am late. Story of my life.) I thought I would answer my friend’s question from her blog.
Remember the Honey Grahams commercial? “So happy together!”
I know it’s a Turtles song. But remember the commercial? Do they even make that cereal anymore? I don’t remember it being good, but because it wasn’t boring, made out of super cardboard, and was not healthy, we didn’t get to eat it. That alone made it look AMAZING.
Digression!
Jason and I met in college. But not like “oh he was the hot dude across the hall” kind of meeting. It was less romantic at first and much more painful. And mean. I was really really mean to him.
I know that now. (He kind of deserved it though)
Jason was best friends with some people that were from his high school that lived in my hall. He actually went to a different college in a different town. He would come up every Monday night to watch football with his buddies and I would be watching Ally McBeal (read: the best show that was ever on TV. Bygones. )
We met through these mutual friends and eventually it turned into him having a crush on me. It’s true. He’d admit it. I can say now that he was really sweet and fairly mature in how he handled it. In my 18-year-old mind he looked like a stalker.
He left a flower for me once, taped to my dorm room door. Sweet right? I wanted to die. And hide. I was afraid he’d come back with a knife. How silly we are as teens. le sigh.
The big turn from friends to maybe-dating-in-his-mind-but-not-mine was the date auction. My freshman hall held one to raise money. I was put up for sale. Not wanting to be the only person who left the stage without a bid, I asked Jason (then, in my mind, the sweet kid from Cincinnati who was a safe friend) to come up and bid up the price. Just a couple of bucks. I would pay him back.
This is what he heard: “I love you with all my heart and would like you to come up and outbid everyone in the room and sweep me off my feet.” This is not what I said.
I suppose you know how that ended. Even though I was shooting daggers from my eyes at him, willing him to stop outbidding everyone, he seemed to think I was only staring intently into his eyes.
He won.
I was livid.
Our stories diverge here. He really only bought me for like $60 tops but he SWEARS it was over $100. Please. Tell me who has $100 as a college freshman? Whatever.
So since he bought me he had to take me on a date. Serves him right. He took me to Olive Garden (we still go regularly) and to a poor college kid that is HIGH CLASS. Seriously.
But he showed up to pick me up with his shoelaces untied. True. See picture above for evidence. (We were all of 18 or 19 in that pic) (Please excuse my weird haircut – I was growing it out at the time and had yet to really discover all that is a hair dryer and round brush.) In my mind I thought there was no way I could take him seriously if his shoelace was untied. Plus he was a stalker.
Needless to say it didn’t work out. I wanted to be free and date LOTS of dudes and he was all serious and mature. Whatever.
It seemed like we always got back in touch after I moved back to Ohio each fall at the start of each new year. Each time I remembered how sweet, smart and mature he was. And I would agree to a date, thinking “he’s a good guy and I should make this work.” And then I was like “nah I want to be FREE!” <scoff> I was kind of an idiot at that point. Plus it was really really mean. I mean, I was letting him take me out, fall all madly in love with me again each time (he was) and then going nah.
Fast forward to my senior year. We had stayed friends – really great friends actually. He was one of the best people I had ever met and was so patient and smart and so so funny. Then he showed up at my door senior year and he had muscles. <-- I won’t deny it. That was what pushed me over the edge of thinking he was kind of dweeby and cute to thinking he was sexy.
And then about three months later I was the stalker, telling him I was so in love and that he had to stay with me even after I graduated. (What a sappy ding dong. Me. Well him too, but much earlier. And longer really. He wins!)
And in February 2004 we were engaged. Image is from our engagement party. My hair is MUCH better here and he had his shoelaces tied. Believe me, he ALWAYS does now.
And this past fall we celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary, and we are approaching our 7th now. We joke and say that he wore me down.
Glad he did.
Its that time again. For shots. Typically we go to VetCo to get them for a few reasons:
1. cheaper
2. cheaper
3. cheaper
There are drawbacks as well, namely there are OTHER DOGS THERE. And you have to wait in line WITH OTHER DOGS. Which means I spend 40 minutes waiting while wrestling an exceedingly mad corgi and trying to tell people that no, the dog with the muzzle is the dangerous one actually, and no, you can't pet him even though he looks nicer than this one.
I basically feed an entire bag of treats to Roxy in an attempt to distract her from THE OTHER DOGS OMG THEY ARE EVERYWHERE.
Because: everywhere = MINE <--if she were talking.
And they are in it. And it's hers. In case it wasn't clear.
They sell FOOD at the pet store people, what else is she to do other than panic.
We are going to the regular vet this year. With my partner working weekends now, I can't stomach the idea of another year at VetCo (PetCo) by myself. It's not only exhausting, but very very very embarrassing. Have you even read this blog?
I learned the Giardia vaccine is discontinued this year. Great. Roxy has gotten Giardia not once, but twice. Has she gotten Bordatella or whatever the letters are in the DHPP shot? Nope. So I am telling my partner.. well, let's just recap:
Me: I called 3 vets and they all discontinued it
Him: it made leg bones fragile
Me: oh. god that is NOT good for one particular dog
Me: its like either way she is screwed
Me:more broken legs or giardia!
Him: no i made that up
Me: oh
Me: dang
Me: good one
My partner doesn't like to text, because he has a phone he stole from Zack Morris and hello, it doesn't DO ANYTHING other than make calls. wtf. Who want's a phone like THAT?
So he always complains when people text him. And I am forever saying, you know that "new every two" plan you are on? Yeah you have like a million credits. GET A NEW PHONE.
He messages me today:
Him: your brother is "bored at work" so he's texting me
Me: really?
Him: i don't want to be rude, but texting on my phone sucks ass
Him: so i'm not really interested in it
Me: tell him that
Him: it takes too damn long to type that!!!
Me: lol
Me: say txting on my phn sux
Him: that would take like two minutes
Me: omg
Me: you are a baby
Me: GET A NEW PHONE
Me: want me to txt him from MY phone to tell him?
Him: yes!
Me: omg
So I did.
My partner is obsessed with Avril Lavigne. To the point that even one of his BFFs (cute right?) teases him about the fact that the only CD in his car is Avril's.
To the point where I DRESSED UP as her for Halloween last year. Yes. I know. Oh believe me, we still have the outfit. Yeah, I know. He dressed up as his yearly "Mr. Football Head" while I painstakingly painted my fingernails black, donned an itchy wig and wore a tiny skirt with tight fishnets and heels all night. Meanwhile he's in a jersey. And that... mask.
Today he IMs me frantically.
Him: avril broke up with that sum41 guy!
Me: they divorced?
Him: separating!
Me: hmm. wait, don't be so happy ass.
She can have him. You see, I am doing him a favor. I will never EVER be that tiny and that blonde, not together and not separately. So have her. If she'll take you.
Might be rockin' to have her hanging around anyway. I can walk out in the morning drinking coffee and she would be there, having to look hot all the time and taking that chore from me, and I could be like, "Hey Avril! Sing Girlfriend!" And then she would have to and then I could dance before I have even had breakfast.
This is in response to Dooce's marriage questions... I won't bore you with introductions because it's a long post.
What are your middle names?
Mine is Marie, though I tried to drop it when I got married and then my mother about had an aneurysm, so I kept it and added McMullen, my maiden name, so now I am like some crazy foreign person: Breanne Marie McMullen Boyle. And my name takes up two lines on my driver's license. Ugh.Oh yeah, and Jason's is Gabriel.
How long have you been together?
This October we will be married 5 years. We have known each other since we were both 18, so basically 10 years. However I did not really like him until circa 2002.
How long did you know each other before you started dating?
Crap, it's just like school. I didn't look at the next question before answering above. We knew each other - well, actually that's an interesting question. We had our first date in the first year we knew each other and roughly once a year every year after that, though we never "dated" (read: I didn't like him or think he was cootie-less) until Senior year of college. So whatever the hell that all means.
Who asked whom out?
He won me at a date auction for our first date. I was not pleased. He swears to this day he spent like a million dollars to win me but really it was $20. And then we lived happily ever after... after I broke it off a few times and then finally couldn't be away from his newly formed muscles senior year.
How old are each of you?
I'm going to be 28 in June and he will be 29 in September.I LOVE that he will be 30 almost an entire year before I will. I will have all that time to talk about how he and I aren't even in the same DECADE if ages.
Whose siblings do you see the most?
Jason has none, so mine. I have one brother.
Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
That's an interesting question because I would say in general that we don't really have issues (GAG). We've never really disagreed. Well, if you don't count how he was IN LOVE with me for YEARS and I thought he was sort of a dweeb. But other than that, I guess if I think hard on it... I'd say that he isn't totally open with me on how he feels? But then again, I think he is just That amiable about Everything, so maybe it's not a problem at all? He would probably say that I am messy, and I am. And that we should have sex more.
Did you go to the same school?
Nope. He went to University of Crap Cincinnati and I went to Miami University of Ohio (the better school. I mean he doesn't even frame his diploma, while mine is on the wall in a humongous frame. Chalk it up to say we had different experiences.)
Are you from the same home town?
Nope. He is from Cincinnati and I was born in Long Beach, loved in Whittier until the age of 7, when we moved to Upland. All of those places are in California.
Who is smarter?
Jason. Hands down. It's incredibly hot. When I watch him code, I get super horny. No joke.
Who is the most sensitive?
Definitely, unequivocally me. Read the one about what our issues are up above. I think I made up an issue.
Where do you eat out most as a couple?
We eat out a lot because I don't like to waste time cooking, unless it has chocolate in it. And Jason is fine with that. So when we eat out our favorite place is House of Shabu Shabu in Irvine (our picture is on the wall - we are totally those people), and Miguel's Mexican in Lake Forest. We also love Olive Garden (it was where our first date - where he BOUGHT me - was as well).
Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
Mexico. For our honeymoon. I will get that boy out of the country some day. (I don't consider Mexico enough travel to consider one a world traveler or an international).
Who has the craziest exes?
I have more exes. A lot more. So by statistics, I would guess me? Wait. Hold that thought. I am friends with like 90% of my exes... and he does have one sort of weird ex-girlfriend that I won't detail here. So never mind, he wins.
Who has the worst temper?
Hmmm. Well, I have the McMullen temper, which flashes quickly and hotly and goes from like 1 to 10 very very quickly, though I can exercise more patience than most of the McMullen clan. Jason gets fired up about political things, human rights issues, absurdities, and stupid people. SO HOT.
Who does the cooking?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Once, when we were dating, and it was Valentine's Day, Jason made homemade lasagna. And it was amazing. And then, never again. And then, a year later, we were engaged. What was wrong with me? So when there is cooking happening, it is me. When I make something new, I always ask these questions:
Do you like it?
Should I make it again?
Because, inevitably he will answer yes or mumble some sort of positive response to the first one, which doesn't mean that the answer to the second one is Yes. So the second question must be asked.
Who is the neat-freak?
Please. Him. All the way. But mostly because I have insanely more crap than he does. And shoes. I have a lot of those and I leave them everywhere.
Who is more stubborn?
Haha! Me.
Who hogs the bed?
I don't think either of us do. We used to spoon a lot more and now we basically sleep on our sides. We're both small enough people that we don't hog much. He does however MESS UP THE BLANKETS NIGHTLY AND IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME ONE BIT.
I like straight sheets.
Who wakes up earlier?
Please. Me of course. If Jason wakes before noon I think his ears fall off or something.
Where was your first date?
Olive Garden and a Shakespeare play in Cincinnati. I think Midsummer Night's Dream... mostly I think that because that is the most overdone W.S. play and so it's likely. That was the date where he BOUGHT me. Our first real, I think I might be in love with you date? Funny, but I don't remember it. I remember when I first saw him senior year of college after not talking for about a year, and I remember a date where we went bowling and I noticed that he had the cutest butt EVER and that I was holy shite, falling in love with him.
Who is more jealous?
Probably me.
How long did it take to get serious?
Oh sheesh. Read above. I didn't like him for years. He was always the best person I ever knew and somehow I knew I should love him and then one day I went holy crap why didn't I realize this before? I think it was around Jan/Feb of 2003.
Who eats more?
I'm a snacker. Jason eats bigger portions than I do though.
Who does the laundry?
I used to and then I had a laundry mental breakdown a few years ago and now we are just responsible for own clothes getting cleaned. It's a great setup.
Who's better with the computer?
Jason. He can code. Sexy!
Who drives when you are together?
Usually he does. But he only wants to drive his car. My car apparently has a crappy clutch (where was that "who is the most sensitive one?" question?). He drives much slower than I do and I have come to be (slightly) patient with it.
Having two dogs that occupy our time, makes my partner and I often talk like idiots. Our conversations very often go like this, whether in person or on IM:
Me: Did Roxy poop today?
Him: No she doesn't like to poop in the morning.
Me: Well she didn't poop for me either. I hope she doesn't poop inside.
Him: I think I smelled poop last night when I woke up to get a drink. I thought maybe Roxy pooped in her crate.
Me: Did she poop in her crate?
Him: No there was no poop but she probably hid poop somewhere.
Me: That dog needs to get on a poop schedule if you ask me.
Him: Yeah the other day, when she pooped, she like walked 10 feet to finish it.
Me: Really? I thought only Crazy Dog did that.
Him: No Crazy Dog just doesn't eat for days, then gets sick and then has diarrhea all over.
Me: True
It's so freaking sexy, I can hardly stand it.
